Whitney Orth is a hot mess. She’s lived most of her life eating Taco Bell, wearing sweats, and rarely brushing her teeth. After a quarter of her life (assuming she makes it to be 100 years old)
she found herself horrifically alone with only a cat and Netflix to love her—and let’s be honest, neither of those things are actually capable of love. In 2016, she’s going to try to pull herself together and become—once and for all—a well-rounded, full-fledged adult. By the end of the year she’ll be drinking black coffee, reading about the comings and goings of financial whatsits, and completely forgetting the life stories of all the real housewives. We hope.